via Daily Prompt: Meaningless

Do you dream vividly? 

Do you remember your dreams?

Do you forget them?

Do you like to interpret them?

I consider myself lucky. Not only do I dream vividly and I always remember, but my dreams sometimes are so real that I use them as inspiration for my creative writing. It’s like I dream in movies and I can write down verbatim every emotion, feeling and aspect of what I dreamed.

Oh and I have had some doozies.

I always hate waking from a good dream but I am always eager to hit my laptop to write down the details and turn them into a story.

Sometimes dreams can be a complete disaster though and I am not talking about nightmares. I am talking about stress dreams.

Have you ever had one?

They’re not quite a ‘nightmare’ but they’re not exactly a friendly, yet satisfying jaunt with the cast of Magic Mike either….

Definition From Wikipedia: An anxiety dream is an unpleasant dream which is less disturbing than a nightmare. Anxiety dreams are characterized by the feelings of unease, distress, or apprehension in the dreamer upon waking. … Though they create anxiety in the dreamer, anxiety dreams also serve as a way for a person’s ego to re-set.

When these dreams hit, I like to pull out my dream dictionaries and try to decode whatever it is my subconscious is trying to tell me (You know, because I am a curious over-thinker like that)

Does my dream possibly mean something?

It’s no secret that I have trouble sleeping on a good day and I have certainly become extremely agitated and restless after my surgery. Sleep does not come easily for me, even with painkillers and feeling crummy. I am antsy. I am tired of laying around. I am not relaxed at all. Because of my procedure, I can’t even sit or attempt yoga to try to relax my body (though I am using deep breathing techniques, lavender and my salt lamp to help) so trying to lull myself off to la la land isn’t working well.

(Laying on my stomach using my remote keyboard while writing this blog isn’t exactly relaxing either….)

I find myself sleeping for only a few hours at a time and last night these stress dreams took my frustration and really went to town.

Now I am not going to list all my crazy dreams (and there were many) but one really bothered me.

I was standing on a sinking cruise ship, that was literally becoming a block of ice beneath my feet and yet it was sinking in the middle of a warm Caribbean sea. I was freezing cold being coaxed to jump to my rescuer who was waiting with open arms in a small boat. When I jumped into my rescuers arms, he threw me into the warm water and made me swim to safety at the safe cruise ship anchored nearby. When I got on that ship, a hurricane blew up and I started watching people die as they were swept out to sea.

Nice right?

Let’s just say I woke up with a start.

As ‘imaginary’ as it was, the situation made me completely tense. My head hurt, my body hurt. I wasn’t having a panic attack but I needed to calm down and just breathe. I was angry and frustrated. I felt like I hadn’t even slept even though I had slept for at least two hours.

When I finally fell asleep again…… another dream appeared….. different circumstances, although another incredibly stressful situation….. I had the same emotions and feelings when I woke up. It was the same pattern all night.

Let’s just say I woke up with a headache this morning and I do not feel rested, restored or inspired.

I decided to look up the term “Sinking” since that stood out to me the most.

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Reference: A Dictionary of Dream Symbols: With An Introduction to Dream Psychology by Eric Ackroyd

 

Let it be known that when I also looked up the term ‘Ship’ in the same book-  it said that it represents ‘Mother or female figure’

Interesting right?

(I do find Dream Psychology intriguing-maybe one day I will write a proper essay on it when I am not a zombie)

Is it my imagination, my subconscious, my anxiety or the fact that maybe I should quit scrolling Twitter before bed….who knows for sure.

The fact that my anxiety is bleeding into my sleep is wearing me out. 

I just hope the next time I fall asleep, that I am back to regular scheduled dreamy time programming and not waking to shove my nose in a dream dictionary to figure out what’s apparently ‘really’ bothering me, though lets face it. I know what’s bothering me…..

This is most likely a side effect of having to come off my antidepressants temporarily…. and the truth is…..

I’m sick and tired of feeling sick and tired!

All this said, I am curious…..

I’d love for you to answer my questions.

How do you dream? Do they haunt you? Inspire you? Stress you out? Do you like to decode your dreams?

Or do you find them completely meaningless?

(Post today inspired by sinking cruise ships, hurricanes, dreams and today’s Daily Prompt Word:Meaningless)

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