She couldn’t take it anymore,
All the smiling behind the pain.
She couldn’t hold it in anymore,
The anger- the frustration toward people who just don’t know her at all- while they have known her for so long.
Who are they to judge?
Who are they to assume?
After years of playing nice and by the book,
After time and time again of letting things slide,
Suddenly feeling worn, defeated and dark.
They come from all sides,
Seemingly taking advantage of her strength and position.
Trying to find her weakness.
The devil on her shoulder slowly silencing the angel within, prepping for an outer battle yet to be had. The inner one having begun.
Wanting to teach people lessons suddenly seems ‘only fair’- after all- they want to provoke her, perhaps they shouldn’t bite the hand that has been so kind to them all these years? Perhaps they should realize that maybe they aren’t so perfect either? Perhaps they need a taste of their own medicine?
The angel- the good side wants to rise above and just walk away from all the negative. She wants to keep everything as adult and kind as possible. She doesn’t want to forgive those who are taking advantage of her position but she knows that walking away will be better then letting it slide and much preferable to retaliation of any kind.
An inner battle plays out.
Exhaustion seeps in.
So silence rules.
Avoidance becomes the norm.
Withdrawn she silently stews.
Starting to question who she is anymore and what she is about.
Maybe the others see something in her she doesn’t?
Maybe who she thinks she is- isn’t really how people perceive her?
Perhaps she has been lying to herself all these years.
The power of words have hit their mark and are festering deep within.
The attitudes and judgement of others mingle with her own self doubt, slowly erasing what confidence she had. The negative slowly consumes the positive within her. Questions flicker through her mind.
Devil or Angel.
Which to let loose?
Which path to choose?
Which one will break or make her?
That last question makes her laugh.
Is she going mad?
She rocks back and forth in a corner, whiskey in hand she eyeballs the pills sitting on her counter.
Perhaps there is a third option………
The angel and devil quit their arguing.
United in wanting to keep her alive.
Keep themselves alive.
The glass of whiskey drops to the floor, shattering much like her heart and soul.
She lets the tears fall.
Still feeling lonely, hurt, confused and just………done.
Unwilling to pick any path, she lies in wait.
But for what?
This battle wages in so many people who can’t bring themselves to speak.
Those who suffer alone in silence while surrounded by friends and family. Those who don’t feel like they have friends or anyone who will understand. The popular- The unpopular. Those from all colors and creeds. Young and old. You may have an idea who it may be- or you may not know at all.
The moral of this story is:
You never know who is fighting what battle- so choose your words wisely.
Be the antidote- not the reason.
Written by Irene ©TheyOnceCalledHerPumpkin
Featured Image: ©TheyOnceCalledHerPumpkin
Story inspired by today’s Daily Prompt: Unravel